Wednesday, December 30, 2009

How To Be Happy

Have you ever asked "how do I become happy?"

Do you often experience times when you are sad, lacking fulfillment, or simply seeking more purpose? I've pondered this question over the past ten years and discovered a process to help me reconnect with my own happiness to be a happy person that, frankly, works better than any antidepressant medical doctors can prescribe.

How WE Can Be Happy People:

Most people agree that there is either (a) a creator who created this Earth who is an infinite being and omniscient (often referred to as "God") or (b) an energy in science that runs through all things that causes all mystery and things to be connected (quantum physics). For the sake of this article, let's just call both of these energies the SAME energy, or "God" consciousness. Although I recognize other people's choices in deciding to call energy or science "God" or even to call themselves "atheists" who don't believe in any God at all, I find that at the crux of my own happiness is a faith in such a divine being. I also find my own path to happiness is usually connected with finding ways to connect with that source of power. If you can find faith in God, you will typically begin discovering happiness, or light, from whatever darkness you might be experiencing. Just as our eyes must adjust to the sun when we emerge from a tunnel underground, it may take a little time to adjust to the light. After you blink a little, you can see the brilliant colors all around you! In fact, your greatest happiness may follow the deepest trials and tribulations. But this energy is all around you, at all times. Faith in that energy is the first step on the path to happiness.

This "God" energy is everywhere. It is omniscient.

This energy is both the light and the darkness - it comprises the whole of everything. This concept of both side comprising the whole is an Eastern thought - in Western religion, we've been told that these two energies are separate. But in my opinion, the Eastern viewpoint is much more in alignment with the nature of how things actually WORK in the world. In order to have energy flow through our electric current that supplies light in our households, we need both a positive and negative terminal. This is also proven by a simple Duracell battery, with the + and - terminals. Our own bodies have positive and negative energy flow. The light and dark are required for a full day on Earth. Even in basic elements of life energy, there is a positive and negative, but they are both required in order for the ENERGY to flow.

Take positive WITHOUT the negative, there is no flow of energy. Therefore, both are required elements. Within each person is a light and a dark side. When we embrace both sides of our self, we are more complete and the love energy within us may flow more fully.

Let's also consider that this energy is ALIVE. Not only alive, but that one word: LOVE, can be used to define it. Therefore, our life form is comprised of LOVE. God is LOVE. We are at ONE with GOD when we focus our energy on LOVE.

In Algebra, we are taught that if A = B, and if B = C, then A = C.

Applying Algebra to LIFE, consider this:


That means no matter what life currently holds for you, love is all around you. Whether you are happy or sad, love is right next door to you. If you are feeling fulfilled or lacking, either way, love is right next to you. Love is around you whether you're seeing it or not. Love is actually WITHIN you even when you are unaware of it, too.

Consider this equation again as a possible formula for the Meaning of Life: if GOD is LOVE, and if GOD is EVERYWHERE, then LOVE is EVERYWHERE.

If love is all around you, and you, yourself, are filled with love, then you are connected with and can connect to that love. Embrace that love and happiness is immediately yours to discover. This is the secret meaning of life so many grapple for years to discover.

1. Connect with the source.

What are ways to connect to the love around us? I'll share a few ideas with you.
  • Meditation. Meditating is focused intention of quieting our "chatter" mind so that we might HEAR more clearly and in a more profound way. Find a way to get yourself quiet and then listen. Meditating and breathing allows the energy to flow through the natural chakra source in our body.
  • Walking (playing) in nature. Go into a garden. Go for a walk on the beach at the ocean or at a lake or river. Hike a mountain. Walk through a field of flowers. By getting into nature, we can find the source.
  • Music. Music is a form of connecting to our chakra, as well. When we play each note of the scale, we are playing each natural tone in throughout the chakra. That is why music makes us feel... to the extent that music is harmonious we will feel the connection of source through our chakra energy.
  • Paint or draw in color. Each chakra location in our spiritual energy is not only a note on the scale, it is also demonstrated through color. By focusing on various colors, we can attune our body with our spirit and be one with source. Try painting your dark side or things that make you feel dark. Then paint things that make you feel happy, joyful, and vibrant. Notice the colors you use. You may experience cathartic release and connect more deeply with your spiritual source and discover happiness through that activity.
  • Connecting with another being. When we connect with an animal or person, we can connect to the source. A friend of mine shares coaching through experiencing connection through horses. It is amazing what we can learn through an animal, or through another person. Be open to possibilities! Another friend loves her kitty cat and finds when holding a cat on her lap, with the cat purring in content happiness, she becomes more happy from the experience. What ways can you connect through animals? It is different with other human beings, but there are numerous ways to connect to spirit through other people. Whether a gentle touch of the hand, a hug, a kiss, or even more intimate gestures may lead us to happiness, as long as the readiness and willingness is present and appropriate.
  • Dance or Yoga. Through movement, we are able to connect to source. It depends on the type of dancing that you do. Partner dancing is a form of connecting to another person and source simultaneously. If you are seeking connecting to source on your own, dance solo like nobody is watching. Literally, when you move your body as if dancing for the universe you will open and unlock things you had not idea were closed off. I perform at a dance tribe with my sax every couple of months called the "YUM SESSION" - I do this because it is amazing to play music that helps people connect to that source - I love to help make it happen! (This is also why I'm writing this article!)
I love playing music to help people discover happiness. In working the energy of the room, I've discovered people experience the greatest release of happiness and joy when I first play something a little outside the scale - or discombobulated - causing their energy to shift and vibrate with the dark side...which would include the use of minor scales, then shift that back to positive energy, major scales. In doing the switch from minor to MAJOR, people experience joy and release! This brings happiness through music!

2. Consider others as yourself (The Golden Rule).

This may sound basic. The Golden Rule directly helps create happiness. If you want people to reach out to you, reach out to others. If you wish to play music with others, ask them to play music with you. If you wish to create wealth, help others create wealth. happiness starts with your first thought that may benefit another. Happiness grows stronger as you speak that which you think that is beneficial for others. Then happiness manifests with your actions that match the thought and speech.

The amazing thing about life, is that you often have to give some, to get some. In dating, a man will often show up with a present for his suitor. His gift is a symbol of affection. In sustaining the human body, we eat food in the form of animals or vegetables to maintain our energy. When we don't eat, we shut down and wither away. Energy from one life form is required to get more energy for our life form. GIVING is a secret to success. Sharing with each other helps us build happiness.

I recall reading a story in How to Stop Worrying and Start Living, a book by Dale Carnegie, about a man who visited a woman who became despondent with worry and loneliness. While the man visited her, he noticed beautiful African Violets throughout her home. He suggested to her that she start to make new starts of her plants and then give them away to people in her community. When the woman passed away, hundreds of people attended her funeral. What happened to this lonely woman that she connected with so many people? Through her gifts of African Violets, she became known as the "African Violet Queen" - who touched so many people with the beautiful flowering plants for their celebrations and various life occasions. She gave love through her care with the flowering plants, and in return she received love from these people. 1

This is how life works. When we put aside our concerns over our fears and anxieties and embrace ways to love one another, our life truly rocks!

I'm not suggesting to love everyone without boundaries or without regard for "yes" or "no" - but to simply give when you have the thought to give. Reach out, connect, and share beatiful moments with each other and your life will be happier.

Spend time in nature. Embrace your artistic side. Find ways to transform from the dark side to the light through art and forms of expression. Then share your insights with others, remaining open to how others might share with you. Do all of this and watch how your happiness grows through repeat experience over time.

1 - Carnegie, Dale. How To Stop Worrying and Start Living. New York: Simon and Schuster, 1984. Print.

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